Thursday, July 31, 2008

Ya Snela Ayhle!

So I am pretty seriously disappointed in this season's reality TV characters. Daniel Feld on Project Runway is kind of hot, but there is definitely no Daniel Vosovic/Jeffrey Sebelia/Christian Siriano. Bish, pls. I am also not seriously invested in So You Think You Can Dance this season.

This was one of my favorite pieces from last season, Lacey and Pasha's hip-hop thingy choreographed by Dave Scott to the Junior Boys' "In the Morning" (also the song that I used in my audition for SMC. HOORAY DROPPING OUT LOTS OF COLLEGES!)



Back to Project Runway, Christian was kind of my fav. because everything he makes is fierce and kind of Victorian. EVERY DAY IS VICTORIAN DAY, BITCH! If I was a designer, I would have Trentemøller make my runway song. Actually, I would probably pull a Santino and make my own song. But either way, this is a video technically by Royksopp called "What Else Is There?" but the vocals are by that Swedish slut from The Knife, Karin Dreijer Andersson. The fnasken in the video is not Karin, though, it is some Norwegian cum dumpster named Marianne Schroder. And the version of the song in the video is the remix by Trentemøller. Sooooo, yeah...



Satan be with you,

'stina

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

You don't have to be such an asshole all the time

So I am sick as shit and I don't know what it is. I almost think it is allergies but I also think it might be the Avian Krugfluenza Spencer shook on us a week ago at Wolf Parade.

I have been laying around on my couch spraying fake chloraseptic spray down my gullet in a filthy American Apparel v-neck and cut off sweatpants that perfectly accentuate my unshaven legs watching A&E's "Intervention" and trying to pick up dudes on the internet all day. It's been rough.

I am about to chomp a half a blister pack of benadryl and go to work, but I wanted to post these two videos by The Virgins and this one other video by Chromeo because, uhh, like, they're good or whatever. I had to stop listening to NWA on my way to work because I guess I'm like a walking HR case or something so I switched to "Rich Girls" and "Bonafied Lovin' ." Now, I can just pretend like I am going out to some swanky club in the 70's instead of pretending I am on my way to a gunfight in Compton.

"Rich Girls" by The Virgins:



"Bonafied Lovin'" by Chromeo:



'stina

you seemed so nice 'til I knew you better

Ever since I heard their Daytrotter session, I've been meaning to download, I mean "purchase at my local independent record store" the Dodos' album Visiter. Take a listen to this little number, "Red and Purple":



Thanks NPR!

So, I can't really tell you much about the Dodos because maybe I'm a bad blogger but I just don't really care where they're from, if they turned off spell-check when they were writing their album title or if they, like me, took French in high school. Maybe I'm a bad blogger because I'm about to link you to wikipedia. You see what I did there? Ha! Maybe I'm a bad blogger because I'm not going to pretend that every sound that I find pleasing is some kind of quasi-religious experience. Maybe I'm a bad blogger because I can't actually explain why I like what I like because it's more emotional and kinesthetic than technical and analytical. Maybe I'm just grouchier than usual today because my throat hurts. I don't have all the answers for you people.

But I can tell you that it is a good album. My favorite tracks today are "Winter" and "The Season". Despite a kind of minimalist approach to instrumentation, the sound is full and rich. If I had to play the try to name an influence/make unwarranted comparisons game, I would definitely say Neutral Milk Hotel. Man, I love me some Neutral Milk Hotel.



I gotta go get some Dayquil so I can go to work. Later dudes.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

hey, remember when you told san diego we sucked at conversation?

Hey y'all, check out our vlog! We just had a little chat about the Wolf Parade show on July 20 at Canes in San Diego, their new album and some hypothetical interview questions to show that we are insightful, intrepid journalist types. Also, we had to make a video so we wouldn't have to face off at the roller derby for the right to write about Wolf Parade.



One thing that we didn't really cover without mumbling a lot or talking shit on our bosses was the fact that Spencer played the show sick. He took a little break in the middle. Dan tried to distract us by talking about The Big Lebowski or something but it was pretty clear that he ran away to hurl because when he came back he said he wasn't feeling good. We were really impressed by the dedication that showed to his fans. Working when you're sick sucks. His job is at least ten times better than mine, but I bet it still sucks when he's sick. We appreciated it and we would have liked to know his symptoms so we could look them up on web md. Wouldn't want anything serious to go unmisdiagnosed.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

you think you can defeat me with your rebellious beard?

What is it about Devendra Banhart? I mean, he's basically just this dirty hippie guy with an acoustic guitar who should represent everything I hate and yet he draws me in with an almost Rasputin-like magnetism. He's got a great new video out for "Carmensita" off Smokey Rolls Down Thunder Canyon. I fucking love when he sings in Spanish. Just watch it:



Yeah, that was Natalie Portman, that bitch. Kidding, she's gorgeous and I stopped hating her once I heard she changed her mind about being Catherine in Wuthering Heights. Bitch couldn't pull that shit off. I want to see Lindsey Lohan in that role, back on the sauce, off the spray tan and crazy as fuck. Not going to happen.

Speaking of people I'd like to see in Wuthering Heights Gael Garcia Bernal is in this Devendra Banhart video teaser for the same album set to the song "Seahorse". Gael Garcia Bernal would be my choice for Heathcliff, not the typical British Whitey McWhiterson. Stay true to the book people!



I don't know why they insist this was a teaser and not a music video. Shit's eight minutes long, but whatevs. Devendra Banhart, you do what you want.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

If you feel like dancing, dance with me

I just wanted to remind everyone that tonight is the Rocky Votolato show tonight at The Casbah. I will sign your tits. Seriously. Just ask.

Also, this band Bishop Allen came on shuffle yesterday and I felt compelled to post one of their videos and instruct y'all to check them out. I heard about these dudes because the singer, Justin Rice, was in this horrible indie movie "Mutual Appreciation" (part of the "mumblecore" movement?). Justin Rice has a really bad case of the hot and a good portion of his music was used in the soundtrack. Two good songs are on their 'space, "Things are What You Make of Them" and "Flight 180."

I present you a video:






Also, I found the live version of that new Sunset Rubdown song Megan posted about a while ago, tentatively titled "You Go on Ahead." It sounds pretty promising. When I say promising I mean I like it and will fight anyone who dares say otherwise. JUST TRY ME, BITCH!!!




and I will appear before you virgin white if virgins are still chaste,

'stina.

hate week continued

The other day I was out shopping for some more eyeliner and glitter because a lady can never have too much, when that Jack Johnson song about bubble toes came on the store muzak. There was a girl nearby with her boyfriend. She was trying on bronzer and he was trying to figure out how it came to this and what he could do to escape. He said, "Hey, have you heard of this guy?" and she inevitably replied, "Yeah, OMG I love Jack Johnson." He said, "Yeah, me too." I guess it's kind of like that Deep Blue Something song about Breakfast at Tiffany's except actually, much more annoying.

Because seriously, what rock would people have been living under where they would not have heard of Jack Johnson and heard him done to death? Even my mom hates Jack Johnson and she likes all kinds of boring stuff, like U2. She actually emailed the adult contemporary station several times asking them to never play Jack Johnson again. True story. She says he sounds like he writes the same song with the same rhythm over and over again. I can't tell if that's true or not because I feel like the only song of his I ever hear is that one about the toes. I don't want to know about your toes dude. No thanks.

Moving along, I used to really like this song by Flo Rida, mostly because it used to give me a little giggle before I'd heard it a gajillion times.



I liked to sing the little back up parts. I used to pop around the corner when the girls at work were singing it just to throw in a little, "WITH THE STRAP!" It's double fun in an opera voice.

Now I can't take it any more. I wish that the next time I hear it somebody would say, "Enjoy it, for this shall be the last. All copies will self-destruct when this one finishes playing." I would jump around so hard. Conversely, I would get super low. I would shout every word that I knew. It would be so amazing to just let it all out and then put that shit away. Just put it away.

3 important announcements for tonight:
1. Rocky Votolato at the Casbah=Ponygirl stalking opportunity.
2. OMG Project Runway
3. For the out of towners, Grizzly Bear on Late Night with David Letterman
Happy hump day, y'all.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

The Space Between (my dick and your ass)

I was going to wait until tomorrow morning to start hateblogging, but Megan's entry pissed me off so much I have to do it now. We are writing about bands/artists we hate in an effort to get y'all to comment. We know you're reading. I mean most of you are looking for weird bondage/bestiality porn but still, you're reading.

I hate Dave Matthews and his band. I hate the way his voice sounds like he has a snot bubble stuck in his throat. I hate saxophone solos. I hate the cougars in tiered paisley print skirts that wind their aging hammerasses around an invisible stripper pole in the woods to his songs. Dave Matthews makes me want to polish my hymen with a chainsaw.

I have a long list of bands that I somewhat openly (some more than others) hate that a bunch of my friends are into. There are some pretty serious dealbreaker bands for me, like My Super-Gay Romance and Dickelback- I probably won't even talk to you if you like Nickelback because I know automatically that you are 110 different kinds of stupid. What Nickelback did to Canada's music reputation is what Creed did for America's. Make it a shitty fucking joke. I digress.

People who are really into Dave Matthews and his muu-muu often tell me to "relax and just go with it" when I mention my disdain for his Kermit the Frog lite over a waterfall of droning clean electric guitar riffs. That's the point! I don't want to "relax and just go with it." 1. That sounds like preparation for a colonoscopy. I'm too young to have cameras in my butt. At least without getting paid a lot. 2. If I wanted to "relax and just go with it" I would hit up FM 94.9's Big Sonic Nap. Or drink a fucking gallon of moonshine in under an hour. Nothing says relaxation like a coma.

Guess what else? His videos suck too. Hibatchi123 commented "All dave songs make me want to drink some beer" [sic] on youtube on the Dave Matthews Big Gay Band video for "Crash Into My Poop Chute" and to a certain extent he/she is right, they make me want to drink. Except my beverage of choice is a large steaming mug of oleander tea. The video for "The Space Between" features a couple black dudes, his band mates or whatever. There is a lot of contrast so they are pretty much just shadows with instruments. If I know anything about havin' soul, I know these dudes want to blow off this balding cracka-ass bitch to start an Earth, Wind and Fire tribute band. They do, however, probably get paid pretty well . Ahh shit, now I just sound like a racist.

And what, pray tell, is Dave currently up to? Making more ringtones for me to tear my eyelashes out to.


got a lot of lashes left to go,

'stina.

Monday, July 21, 2008

40 oz. to shut the hell up

This week, in addition to our Wolf Parade fangirl blitz we'll be running a special series on over-rated bands we hate. I mean, we're all twitterpated still because OMG he looked at us, but we can't be swooning on divans and loosening our corsets all day long. We'd never get any work done. To get the ball rolling, I'm just going to throw something out there and I need y'all to be ready to catch it.

I don't date boys who like Sublime. Pretty basic. I don't know if it's just the part of the country I live in or what, but this restriction practically makes me a nun. What's my problem with Sublime? The same problem I have with fourteen year old boys. No, not the one where they tell their parents about me and I have to do a lot of serious work on their old man to keep my ass out of the pokey. The one where fourteen year old boys are really fucking dumb. Actually, I guess those problems go together.

Moving along, what is up with Sublime? Seriously? Homeboy died in 1996 and the band was over. That is 12 long years of smoke two joints what I got bad fish what I got caress me down smoke two joints repeat, but I guess y'all have been too high to notice. I just get this sense about Sublime fans more than with any other band that in making the decision to like Sublime one is also committing to a certain lifestyle that I find just as tired and boring as the songs, the lyrics, listening to bros talk, etc. I just don't feel like I need to get high every day and fuck an endless succession of guys with low I.Q.s, big trucks and small feet. Because you know what they say about small feet.

Teeny tiny pedicures.

My favorite thing about Sublime is the song about the LA riots and sheltered suburban kids I went to high school with used to get at least six kinds of amped on it like, "yeah, 187 on a cop bro! Fuck yeah!" Like we weren't in second grade when that shit went down. Like they didn't smoke out with the campus police anyway. Like they wouldn't have hid under a rock and waited for the riots to end, clutching their blankies and sobbing. God fourteen year old boys are dumb. I think that's why I usually don't date anyone under 30. Natural selection should take care of this shit.

So yeah, Sublime=dealbreaker. Edit your social networking profiles accordingly gentlemen.

Set phasers to FANGIRL

...so we can shoot photons of love at you, Spencer Krug!

Oh man, that is creepy. I heard from someone that we are going to do a tag-team videoblog show/album review for Wolf Parade (the show last night at Cane's/At Mount Zoomer), so keep your eyes peeled.

In the mean time, here are a couple pictures I took last night. I never claimed to be a photographer and above that I didn't just arbitrarily take 22 pictures of The Krug- bitches be jostling me and not letting me through to take pictures of my beloved theremin-playing Angel from above (Canada), Hadji. Or Jenni's beloved married love nugget, Dan. Jenni took some pictures with a real film camera, so hopefully she got some decent photos of...oh, you know...the rest of Wolf Parade.








That last one is the real money shot. Homeboy turned around and bared his chompers, just for us! Probably because he knew the Pony Girls would write nice things if he gave us at least one picture.


Canadian bacon is really just round ham but I still wonder what they call it,

'stina.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

I'll believe in anything you tell me to, Spencer Krug

Yo, Pony Girl Club field trip tonight!

We are going to see Wolf Parade at Cane's! Ask us to sign your titties!

Friday, July 18, 2008

HonkeySpace: A Place for Hunting Buddies

Yesterday some brohamulasaurus rex leaned out the window of his brodozer to ask me what I was listening to at a stoplight. That was weird. When I am driving to work or dance I am trying to get in a zone and that zone does not involve being yelled at by other motorists. I screeched "REGGIE AND THE FULL EFFECT" and snorted disapprovingly before peeling out of the stoplight. Naw, I have front wheel drive. The only thing I'm peeling out of is your mom. OH SNAP. I hope he was on his way to some brofessional broga classes, perhaps located in brotropolis, the brohamas or even the bromuda triangle. Broseph Stalin looked like the kind of guy that would eat broatmeal or brogurt for breakfast. Something light. His buddy Broba Fett looked like a broham sandwich kinda guy though. He also looked kinda like this brobot I saw at a party once, Brohan Solo. Brojangles was so broasted he was trying to merc Bro Diddley's brocaine and wanted to have a broetry slam. Out of nowhere, Brosemite Sam came out of bromoflague with a broa constrictor, I had to brodini out to a new brocation to try and find bromance with a new bromo sapien anyways. He tried to get all bro vs. wade on my ass and...that signals the end of my ability to continue to try to form sentences using bro words. Bromaldehyde. Atbrosphere. Broconomy.

Ahh shit, that was a lot of bro. Back to what I was originally supposed to post about...

REGGIE AND THE FULL EFFECT!

One of my favorite seriously kind of gay bands. Reggie is James Dewees, the drummer from Coalesce (FUCK YEAH!...ugh) and the keyboardist from The Get Up Kids, one of my OTHER favorite seriously gay bands. They get a whole post to themselves, though. I like a lot of really seriously gay bands like The Anniversary and Cross My Heart but I also like Norwegian black metal so if you talk shit on my gay bands I'll punch you in the throat with my dragon rings on. Not a buddy punch, either.

I love the Reggie videos because they are hilarious. I wish there was a video for my favorite song "Thanx for Stayin'," but alas, there is not. So here is my second favorite, "Get Well Soon:"



And "Take Me Home:"



Lastly, the "Congratulations Smack & Katy" video rules ass:



I think my eyes are melting and I need to get away from the computer,

'stina.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

You're so hot you're making me sexist. Bitch.

I don't have a grip of time for complaining today, unfortunately for y'all. I know that's your favorite part to read. My trivial complaints about Costco (still Price Club).

So, in lieu of "so and so cut me off on the freeway," or "I'm a white upper-middle class trust fund bitch and my life is hard," I'm going to do a quick News Flash.

Cursive was one of the first indie math-punk/whatever bands I got into back in the day when Saddle Creek/Vagrant/Deep Elm were my main source for band discovery. Apparently these dudes are still around- sans original drummer (he left because he felt his life calling was really taking care of Whippets) and are recording a new album. I didn't say shit was gonna be epic, I just said they were recording. They did Daytrotter a couple months ago because Daytrotter is the new Jenkem and everybody's doin' it.

I like low-budget videos and I like this song:



The other "news" I have is about a local band that sucks less than a lot of local bands, but mostly they just have a really fierce case of the hot. Megan and I accidentally saw War Stories at this 30+ hipster bar downtown because we were going to some assbag's art show and they turned out to be kind of awesome. We decided they were all just sitting around one day and one of them was all like "hey so we are all REALLY hot, we should make a band or something" and that's how War Stories came to be. I'm just kidding, I'm sure they're talented musicians or something like that. At any rate, they are apparently releasing an album but haven't released a lot of information regarding it yet other than a CD release show at the Casbah on August 18th. You can bet your ass we will be there, heckling away.

Official video for "Lion:"




treating men like objects and objects like men since '99,

'stina

Monday, July 14, 2008

What would make me think I should take advice from a guy in capris?

Nothing. I don't have to. You, gentle reader, do have to take advice from me.

I am having a pretty rough morning so far. First, I had to take out the trash or some shit. Then, I checked Jezebel for my morning snark only to find that one of my favorite cosmetics companies, Smashbox, advertises on celebrity weight blog called "The Skinny." I am pretty furious that Smashbox would endorse a pro-ana site like that. I guess I shouldn't be suprised, since girls with really serious body image issues are perfect to force product upon. I hate celebrity gossip blogs and I hate the frenzy following it. The shit I read in the ten seconds I was on there was ridiculous, "Heidi Montag looks healthy." WTF?! She's a 5'3" 00 (21" waist/23" hip) hobag from Colorado that bought her ass, titties, and nose. AND, I can see her ribcage behind the giant plastic dirty pillows. WHAT KIND OF HEALTHY BODY IMAGE IS THAT?! I'd be a talentless hack celebutard if I had half my body and part of my face reconstructed too. FAH!

Who said anything about a music blog? At least this coming two weeks is chock-full of good stuff. Wolf Parade at Cane's on the 20th and Rocky Votolato (yeah, he is related to Cody from The Blood Brothers, they were in Waxwing together) at the Casbah on the 23rd. Rocky Votolato does not play all that post-hardcore screamy shit The Blood Brothers do, he plays pleasant indie-folk-alt-country and has a lovely gravely/breathy voice.



This Rocky show is an acoustic solo gig and I usually prefer to see him with a band but this show is still special. This will be the first time I will see Rocky Votolato sober. I intentionally got drunk at one show, accidentally got a little drunk at the other two and definitely acted like an asshole at all three of them. This will also be the first time I will be seeing Rocky without Jenny Keene. OH GOD SEPERATION ANXIETY.

Here is the video for "White Daisy Passing," one of the best written songs in the history of music:




Previously, I have seen Jesse Sykes & The Sweet Hereafter and his other brother's band, Slender Means open for him. They were actually good, kind of a less-gay Phantom Planet. This time, some sadsack (Owen) from Joan of Arc and some other sad guy (Drew Andrews [oh man, I thought Adam Scott had a bad case of the two first names]) that hangs out with that dude from The Album Leaf are opening. Maybe everyone will want to hit the jacuzzi at the Motel 6 down the street afterwards and make some sad guy soup. No, seriously, it's going to be a really good show.

kiss my big black ass Rian,

'stina.

Friday, July 11, 2008

office space

Do you have a shitty job? TPS reports got you down? Do you, like me, feel uncomfortable talking about your flair? Do you have a special playlist you listen to on your way to work that keeps you from going homicidal on your lunch break? Ponygirls want to know what it is.

My job requires high energy, incessant insipid smiling and a dog-like obedience to the whims of hundreds of strangers, so I try to keep it upbeat. Lately, I'm a little bit obsessed with this lady, Yelle. This song is called, "Mon Meilleur Ami" which translates to "My Best Friend". It's about her vibrator. True story.



Way to make a sack dress adorned with a smiley face look totally hot, Yelle. By the by, her name is an acronym for "You Enjoy Life", with the extra L and E added so French people will treat her like a lady.

Speaking of interesting spelling, I found this sweet video of the B-52s performing their only song that doesn't make me want to stab out my eardrums, "Dance This Mess Around". Remember the 80's and watch for the typo:



Some old dude who used to be my friend put this on a mix cd for me a long time ago and it just popped into my brain a couple weeks ago at work. It struck me that this song is the perfect way for me to get into character because it goes so well with the bubble gum popping, tweenishly be-glittered, overgrown Lolita, nicknamed "Daddy", giggling, sticky lipgloss wearing persona that I affect because sometimes I like to pretend that I'm more like a geisha and less like a waitress.

So yeah, just let us know in the comments: What gets you going?

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

If video killed the radio star, who killed the video star?

THE BUTLER?! It's usually the butler.

Regardless of your answer to my rhetorical question, I have a lot to complain about today.

Snack vultures at Costco are at the top of my list. If you block an entire aisle to muscle your way in for half a hot dog, I will probably...mutter obscenities under my breath. When I say "under my breath" I mean I am half-deaf so you can probably hear me. I am not going to fight you for that sliver of ravioli. I just want some pesto, man.

Next on the agenda, Megan, dude, you have GOT to get a second job. Chili's clearly isn't cutting it. You are posting so much it makes me look bad.

Aaaaaanyways.

Since Alison Bailes over there decided to get all Film 101 on Vampire Weekend, I am going to talk about some of my favorite music videos.


My ultimate all-time favorite director is Mark Romanek. There is an aesthetic quality to his videos that have become kind of signature, at least in my mind.

A lot of you are probably familiar with this video and think it's kinda creepy, maybe a little dirty. I do too. Videos that make you feel weird (like a pedophile in this case) accomplish something- a connection between the artist and the viewer. I also feel like bitch needs a Xanax and a pastrami sammitch. I present you with Fiona Apple's "Criminal."



I remember when Nine Inch Nails' "Closer" video came out I would secretly turn on my TV after midnight in hopes of catching it on MTV. This video weirded me out really hard. It might have been the meat wings, might have been the naked chick with the crucifix mask, might have been my pre-pubescent girl-boner for Trent Reznor hanging from the ceiling. Even if you don't like the 'nails, this video is worth watching because it's a work of art on its own.



Another NIN video, "The Perfect Drug." More gorgeous imagery! The color saturation is great and the Edward Gorey theme is kind of fun. Oh, and Count Trentula's Weimaraner is ADORBS.



Madonna's "Rain" was shot entirely in black and white and later hand-colored. Holy shit. That's a lot of coloring. IS PRETTY.



My last Romanek Video is going to be Weezer's "El Scorcho." This video draws from the band's quirkiness and is a little more fun that some of it's predecessors. It is still well-shot but the story progression is a little more funky. Why isn't Rivers wearing his glasses though? Y U doin' this to me, bb? YOU KNOW DUDES IN GLASSES MAKE ME RANDY!!!



Chris Cunningham is another director I like, he is a pretty weird guy and his videos show that. My first one from him is Aphex Twins' "Windowlicker." The digital effects are kinda nuts. It's a parody of gangster rap videos and the version I am posting is edited to the music, the original video has three something minutes of obscenities.



Next is Bjork's "All is Full of Love." This video came out in '99 so it was pretty cutting edge back then. Also, the Bjorkbots were non-working!



The last Cunningham video I am posting is Madonna's "Frozen." She was going through that weird ethnic/religious crisis thing but about 50 seconds in she falls back and explodes into crows. That's pretty freaking cool. I want to explode into crows!



The final director I am going to note today is Michel Gondry. He made some White Stripes and Bjork videos and whatnot and I like them. According to the internets, Gondry pioneered the "bullet time" (computer-enhanced time-lapse) technique later adapted in "The Matrix."

Devendra Banhart's "A Ribbon":




Bjork's "Hyperballad":



Obviously I am exhausted and have run out of adjectives for videos. Just you wait, it's not over yet!

'stina


p.s. I definitely got rickrolled looking for that Perfect Drug video. Ughhh.

so what if I like gypsies?

Who wouldn't want to invite this guy to their next tea party? Just take a gander at that stache:



Of course, by "tea party" I mean "kegger" and by "this guy" I mean Zach Condon of Beirut. When I heard they were canceling all their summer shows in Europe and Zach said all those things about making changes and promising to come back it sounded like a classic break-up line. Don't worry baby, we can still be friends.

I don't admit this often, but I appear to have been wrong. I read this interview with him this morning and he's talking about possibly releasing an e.p. this fall. Good news!

So I did what any normal girl would do: I wasted the rest of my morning watching the videos for The Flying Club Cup again. Here's the first one, and my favorite song off the album, "Nantes":

Monday, July 7, 2008

where are we moving to? BERLIN!!!!

This morning I'm really digging on this new video by Stars for "Bitches in Tokyo", directed by Experimental Parachute Movement (Kevin Drew and George Vale). Enjoy:



I like anything that encourages me not to wash my hair. Fuck shampoo man. I gotta get me a wig. Also in my bag of tricks today, New Zealand's own Flight of the Conchords, now with some sweet staches, doing a little something special for all the ladies of the world.



Wow, that is some fancy skating. Damn, that is quite a stache on Jemaine. Either something is quivering in my feminine core or I left my cell phone on vibrate.

Moving along, I don't know if we're not talking about Vampire Weekend now that they've been on tv and nobody likes tv, but I'm going to go out on a limb and admit that I like this video for "Oxford Comma" directed by somebody called Richard Ayodade but it looks like some Wes Anderson shit to me:



Something about the lead singer of this band really bothers me. I know it's in his face but I can't place it. He kind of looks like somebody I can't put my finger on who I don't like for some reason I can't remember and it infuriates me. I like that in this video I can't see his face very well most of the time so I'm not distracted by wondering why I don't like him. Seriously, what did that guy do? He has this douche-in-philosophy-class vibe but he could be somebody's lame ex-boyfriend. Maybe he's just a shitty tipper or a guy who stands too close to you on the bus. Maybe he's in a valtrex commercial. Maybe he's the first ponygirl poll: Why do I hate this guy?

Sunday, July 6, 2008

If I see one more of those houndstooth neck scarves I am going to fight someone.

I was going to drop a line about the new Xiu Xiu video until I saw one of the little eye candies featured in the video sporting one of those annoying plaid/houndstooth/clusterfuck-print scarves. Yeah, one of these guys:







Scarf in question:
I hit the red X faster than R. Kelly can say "call my lawyer." In addition to offensive neck wear, I have tried really, really hard to like Xiu Xiu and I just can't so I will have to let someone else write about them. The video MIGHT be cool, I heard there are fashionable, girly looking dudes kissing and stuff but OH MAN that scarf. Especially in Southern California, where lately it jumps between 78 and 97 degrees, scarves are uncalled for and YOU LOOK LIKE A TOTAL ASSHOLE.

So here are some other videos in artsy black and white by a good band. The Walkmen. These dudes did a fierce sesh over at Daytrotter. When I say fierce I mean they just played Leonard Cohen covers, but it's cool man. Better than ScarJo doing Tom Waits. That shit makes me want to punch myself in the back of the head.


We've Been Had:




What's in it for me?:




The Rat:



give me all your money and reese's pieces,

'stina.



Thursday, July 3, 2008

Swedish band warns of the dangers of multitasking

I've been having kind of a shitty time lately. When it wasn't the crushing loneliness of modern existence, it was my grandparents visiting and alternating between telling me I'm too skinny and telling me not to get fat, or it was my job forcing all of us to go to mandatory meetings about how to be nice to people and trying to scare us by talking about the recession. Don't even get me started on the fact that I have come to view sexual harassment from one of my supervisors as the highlight of my day (Question: Is it still harassment if I like it?). Plus assorted personal problems too fucking depressing for ponygirl headquarters.

Instead, let's take a trip to the magical land of Sweden, also known as Ikea, home to Suburban Kids With Biblical Names. I present to you, their video for "Rent A Wreck":



Look at their funny foreign names: Johan Hedberg and Peter Gunnarsson. They could like be articles of furniture that you could buy at Ikea (get it, because they're from the same country, I wasn't sure if you got it the first time, seriously) if you weren't too depressed to put on pants. That could be a funnier joke if their names had more consonants. WHY DO I FAIL AT EVERYTHING????

Ha ha, just kidding y'all. Anywho, these two gentlemen were expected to have another record out in Spring 2008 which is, as some of you may know, over. It's been pushed back to the TBA of September, so we'll keep you posted. Also, according to youtube commenters, the only problem with this band/video is the guy's glasses. Too popular. You are so right dude, eyesight is getting seriously played out. It's everywhere these days, and frankly, I'm sick of seeing it.

I will probably not be posting tomorrow because I plan on being drunk all day or on Saturday because I plan on being hungover and dragging my ass in to work, so I'll take this time to wish you a very happy Independence Day. Be safe, and even if Danger is your middle name, have faith that Will Smith will be there to protect you. The Willenium has only just begun and far be it from him to let us all down so soon.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!

July is finally upon us. I don't know why I said "finally," it's not like I'm waiting for anything. *coughwolfparadeatcane'sonthe20thcough* July also holds Bastille Day, Julius Caesar's birthday and that one day that nobody landed on the moon. Oh and American Independence Day. What if this year it was like that Will Smith movie?



BITCH, WHAT THAT SMELL LIKE?! God that would suck. So on Friday (the 4th of July), if the planet doesn't get EXPLODED by oh, say, 9:30? Come to the Beauty Bar San Diego with us and see Emery Byrd. It'll be fun.

The real reason I am posting today is this month doesn't have any special stuff going on in it (e.g., Black History Month, My Birthday Month, Breast Cancer Month, Halloween, etc.) so I feel like we need to give July some Zazz. Some Zazz, via theremin.

The theremin is one of the earliest electronic instruments as well as the first instrument played without being touched. It's an electrophone with two metal antennas.

Leon Theremin, the inventor (duh):



The loop antenna controls the volume and the stick antenna controls the pitch. The theremin has been used in countless b-movie soundtracks, resulting in its sound being identified as "creepy," despite the fact that unbeknownst to most, it has a place in modern/popular music. Here are a few examples:

Hadji Bakara of Wolf Parade playing a theremin live on "Same Ghost Every Night"




The Pixies' "Velouria"




M83's "Don't Save us From the Flames"




Oh, and a cat playing a theremin



Theremins are the coolest thing ever and I want someone to build me one. FANCLUB GO!!!


'stina.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

y so srs?

I just know that you all will appreciate this... oh, i mean... I hAEv A FEEELInG TAht U AL WiL LiEK tHiS ...